When I was a teenager, you could still cross over the Mississippi (pronounced, down here, "Miss Sippi) State Line and purchase real M-80 and Cherry Bomb firecrackers - really just short "sticks of dynomite". One of these babies would blow off your entire hand, if you were fool enough to light one and hold it, or if you were unfortunate enough to have one go off in your hand due to a quick fuse. We would buy them by the gross (a term not much seen anymore which refers to a dozen dozen, or 144). You could put one of these under a tin can and light it and you had an instant rocket, as that can would travel maybe 30 or 40 feet into the air before falling back to earth.

If you know anything about fire ants, you know that they build huge nests in the ground, and the debris (dirt) from all that tunneling transforms into a large - sometimes very large - cone-shaped mound. Fire ants have been a real problem for farmers and homeowners for many decades, and people have been searching for answers to controlling them for as long as they have been here (they are not native to North America). Naturally, as kids we would take a stick and poke it into these mounds, just to see the fire ants swarming about, inspecting and preparing to repair the damage thus caused to the mound. Or maybe we'd take a shovel or hoe and knock away part of the mound, ants and all. But better be careful, 'cause these things can sting the fire out of you (thus "fire" ants)!

Well, one day my best friend and I were roaming around, seeking that which we might get ourselves into, and possessing a quantity of Cherry Bombs. We found ourselves in my Uncle John's back yard, where there was a huge, magnificent fire ant bed, or mound. One of us - probably me - got the bright idea of destroying that fire ant colony by poking a deep hole in the top of it, going deep into the ground, with an old hoe or broom handle, making the diameter of the hole large enough to drop a lit Cherry Bomb into. 

Having made the hole as deep as we could, and wallowing it out enough to receive the "death charge", we lit a Cherry Bomb, dropped it in that hole, and ran as fast as we could! Well folks, I'm here to tell ya, you cannot outrun flying fire ants from a Cherry Bomb explosion. When that thing went off it blew hundreds of fire ants onto our tee shirt clothed backs, as well as the backs of our heads and arms, and those little buggers weren't the least bit pleased to have been so violently disturbed. Yes, they were alive and well (maybe a little ringing in their ears, but otherwise fully functional)! Immediately, we received far too many fire ant stings to count. I say with confidence that we received hundreds of bites each!

So now you know how to kill fire ants!
    

Copyright May 21st, 2008, by Tom Woodard

Back to Index Musings & Memories               Also visit Antique FAQs